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Thank you for your support

October 9th, 2016 at 07:29 am

Thank you all for your support regarding my impending divorce. The most difficult decision is to figure out how long to let him stay here. I am not sure he has anywhere to go. I hope one of his family members will take him in, but I am not so sure. He has alienated most of them this past year. I have decided to start the divorce process either way. I am going to work on the paperwork and file it later this month with some of my extra money from subbing. It's over $400 for a simplified divorce (no lawyers or assets to split).

I need to ensure we are divorced before he can collect on my social security. I also want my life insurance beneficiaries to be my kids. I have him as the beneficiary and was told since he is my spouse, he would have to sign off for me to leave it to anyone else.

Other than not knowing when to ask him to leave, I am okay. I came to terms with this months ago. Of course, I don't know if I will have a more difficult time when he is actually gone. I have known him almost 17 years. I truly hope he will be amicable. I really do wish him the best. I hope he gets help and can find peace and happiness down the road.

5 Responses to “Thank you for your support”

  1. Jenn Says:

    I wish you the best as you go through this difficult time.

    Perhaps once your ex-to-be realizes that he has to take responsibility for himself, he'll also seek help for his illness. Regardless, be sure to continue taking care of yourself.

  2. snafu Says:

    I'm so sorry you are having to cope with such a major issue that has so many spokes of hurt. I hope you'll use the resources in your community to understand the choices available, the services available, how to make contact and what needs to be done to move the process forward, Clearly, your spouse is refusing help and rejecting everyone who might help. Is there a 1-800 helpline for correct information? What steps are needed to get him out of the house and into care? Do you need a social worker to help? How do you get a mandate to have him assessed? Do you need to be 'legally' separated to get divorced? How do you get him removed as beneficiary from your benefits, SS, Insurance .

    Sorry to only offer questions, I think the answers need to come from professionals so that he likewise gets treatment which could result in the bet possible outcome. Sending prayers and best wishes in this so difficult situation.

  3. LivingAlmostLarge Says:

    I am so sorry with the struggle you are going through. Best wishes, thoughts, and prayers.

  4. rob62521 Says:

    I am very sorry you are having to deal with this, but sometimes you have to just look out for yourself. He is an adult. It is his responsibility to find someplace to live. I know this painful in more than one way, but please look out for yourself and your children.

  5. PatientSaver Says:

    Would 3 months be a reasonable amount of time to give him to find someplace? I don't think you'd want to give him longer becus then it might seem so distant in the future that he doesn't bother to do anything about finding a place til the very last minute.

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